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international news _ JONTY SKRUFFF _ 16th December, 2005

Paris Hilton Desperately Seeks Pop Fame

Super spoiled hotel heiress Paris Hilton has turned to Kylie's original Svengali Pete Waterman to turn her into a pop star, the News of the World reported this week.

"Paris has approached Pete and they are discussing things," the British tabloid revealed, "She knows what a genius he is and she is desperate for him to get her project off the ground."

The pointless porn starlet could struggle in the UK, however judging by her imperious behaviour at a recent perfume launch in London where she terminally alienated Coburn star Tim Healey and Anne Savage after hiring both as DJs for the bash.

"Tim and I decided to play the party because we just thought it would be fun to do, she sent through a playlist of what she wanted and I'd borrowed a load of 50 Cent and all this stuff that I would never normally play," Anne told Skrufff.

"The people that were there were just schmoozing, no-one was bothered about the music, then when she came in we played a few Michael Jackson bootlegs.

"Then at one point she walked up to the DJ box and demanded 'I want Michael Jackson'. " I was like 'OK, I've just played some bootlegs', and she squeaked 'I want the originals, now'. My other half Jay then stepped in and started speaking to the mother and tried to like get Paris to calm down because by then she was slamming her fists on the stage going 'It's my party and I hate this', throwing a real full on tantrum.

It was all starting to get really out of hand then Tim was like ' Quick, put this on' and pulled out a dance record she'd made. As soon as we put that on she was up on the stage, happy as Larry, dancing around in her own private world for about five minutes. Then she just buggered off and we went back to playing decent music. Hilarious."

Tim told Skrufff he'd also found the experience interesting and said meeting her had taught him a valuable lesson:

"Never accept invite to party hosted by a vacuous spoilt, bimbette-heiress who cites Barbie as 'her inspiration'," he laughed, "What were we thinking?" (Jonty Skrufff)

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